The Dick Institute

by Albert Semple, 11 March 2023

  1. All literate men educated in Killie,
  2. Would never take literature out of their willy.
  3. Although they'd agree such behaviours are sick,
  4. They've all taken books or CDs out the Dick.

  5. If curious folk yearned for insects and creatures
  6. And wanted to study their structure and features,
  7. They needn't explore in the undergrowth thick:
  8. They're nailed to the banisters right in the Dick.

  9. When back in Kilmarnock to see my old granny,
  10. Who'd never stick scabby old cats in the fanny,
  11. I'd think how the Council decided to stick
  12. A mangey old specimen right in the Dick.

by Albert Semple
12 lines over 3 stanzas.