Minister's Resignation Letter

A blog post by Albert Semple

6 Jul 2022

A leaked resignation letter from the (fictional) Rt Hon Timon Featherstonehaugh, MP for Dogging-in-the-Wold, explaining that he won't go out to lie for Boris anymore.

I'd reimplant my wisdom teeth, Expose myself on Hampstead Heath. I'd run a mile in wet cement, Elect a Labour government. I'd live with my step-mum-in-law, Chew toffee with a broken jaw. I'd staple both my eyelids shut, Rub salt into a paper cut. I'd eat a gerbil casserole, Serve life in jail without parole. These are things I'd rather do Before I'd tell more lies for you.
Accessible version

The latest in a series of MPs to resign, increasing the pressure on the PM to stand aside.

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