It's OK to Pee in the Sea

by Albert Semple, 2022

  1. It's OK to pee in the sea.

  2. It's OK to cry
  3.  if you go to Dalry,
  4. And feel free to floss
  5.  all the way to Kinloss.
  6. It's fine to feel sick
  7.  between Thurso and Wick,
  8. And cool to feel gay
  9.  around Newport-on-Tay.
  10. And it's OK to pee in the sea.

  11. But best not to sleep
  12.  in a Peebles dungheap,
  13. Or act the buffoon
  14.  on the train down to Troon.
  15. And don't eat the poo
  16.  found in Edinburgh Zoo,
  17. Or hide a dead body
  18.  in sand at Kirkcaldy,

  19. But it's OK to pee in the sea.

  20. Don't steal a car
  21.  on the way to Stranraer,
  22. Nor import cocaine
  23.  on the beach at Culzean.
  24. Don't have an affair
  25.  with a schoolgirl from Ayr,
  26. Nor commit genocide
  27.  passing through Morningside,

  28. But it's OK to pee in the sea.

by Albert Semple
28 lines over 6 stanzas.