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To the Driver of the Audi on the A4042

by Albert Semple, 19 February 2022

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From the collection "Light Humour"

About this collection
Awaiting Gentrification... (24 lines)
Be Kind — Rewind (10 lines)
The Bear Hunt (10 lines)
Cancel Culture (17 lines)
The Christian Meaning of Halloween (8 lines)
The Crypto King (12 lines)
Dog in a Shell Suit Haiku (3 lines)
Free Speech (8 lines)
Geoff the Chef (8 lines)
The Gigolo (17 lines)
The Gluten Glutton (24 lines)
It's OK to Pee in the Sea (28 lines)
The Many Unsuccessful Invasions of Maybole (40 lines)
A Massive Bequest (16 lines)
My Bum isn't Big (12 lines)
My Sister — the Facebook Entrepreneur (12 lines)
My Trusty Laptop (8 lines)
'Nam is short for Cheltnam (38 lines)
The Natural History Museum (16 lines)
Newport 9 (12 lines)
Off The Hook (24 lines)
Parents' Night (12 lines)
The Passive Aggressive Neighbours (32 lines)
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Plagiarism (8 lines)
Poem for the writing prompt #Interface (4 lines)
Public Speaking (4 lines)
Ripped Jeans (12 lines)
Scare-the-Weans Semple (24 lines)
Schadenfreude (12 lines)
Second Person Pronouns (16 lines)
The Socialist Media Influencer (24 lines)
A Text Message from my Mother — Found Poetry (14 lines)
Things I Learned from my Australian Penpal (20 lines)
Things I'd Rather Do (12 lines)
To the Driver of the Audi on the A4042 (24 lines)
Weight Loss Tips (6 lines)

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My car has a dipstick
That is used to check the engine oil level.
Your car has a dipstick
Who sits in the driver's seat
And accelerates to close the gap
When someone indicates to move
Into the lane ahead of you.
Our cars are unalike.
My car has big-end bearings
That connect the pistons to the crankshaft.
Your car has a bell-end
Bearing a striking resemblance
To an angry toddler,
Who has been denied something
That he feels entitled to.
Our cars are unalike.
My car has a knob
That adjusts the volume of the stereo.
Your car has a knob
Who makes rude hand gestures
And angrily flashes the headlights
At any perceived flaws
In other drivers' performance.
Our cars are unalike.
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by Albert Semple
24 lines over 9 stanzas.